“If there is no struggle, there is no progress. Those who profess to favor freedom and yet depreciate agitation are men who want crops without plowing up the ground.” — Frederick Douglass
Grieving the death of a child is the deepest struggle many people will ever face. The pain goes beyond words. Every morning can feel like beginning again without a map. Grief does not follow a straight path or honor a schedule. Many people want to avoid the turmoil grief brings. The world often urges grieving parents to stay quiet, to appear strong, or to move on quickly. But healing requires struggle. Progress in grief depends on facing the unrest directly. Silence and denial do not grow anything lasting.
Growth does not come from pretending the ground is not broken. The heart must be turned over like soil. Avoiding that work leaves us spiritually starved. Grieving parents who engage with their pain open themselves to transformation. A raw heart is a heart ready for planting. The chaos of grief stirs everything inside us. The questions become louder. The memories cut deeper. But that same turmoil also prepares us to receive what peace may come later. Progress begins with agitation. No comfort lasts without first facing discomfort.
Many grieving people worry they are doing something wrong because they still hurt. Pain is not failure. Pain is part of the process. Emotional struggle shows how deeply love reached. Tending to grief with honesty creates fertile ground. The tears, the rage, the emptiness—all of it matters. All of it changes us. The struggle does not erase love. The struggle honors love. In time, even in the mess, new life begins to grow. The world may not see the labor, but the soul feels every inch of the plow.
Thought for today: Do not fear the struggle. Turning the ground of grief is how healing takes root.